taylor swift-喷火龙记

自己到底要的是什么？

就连我自己都不了解自己，更何况是别人。

真的～我不喜欢拖泥带水，不喜欢拐弯抹角。。。

唉～桃子真的不知道该怎么办。。。还是算了吧。。。

今天突然提起什么是恋爱的滋味。。。想想，我还真的是忘了那是什么感觉了。

时间过得真快吖。。。我单身也有一段时间了。。。

因为参与了SWC，里面的MEMBER多数都是情侣档，看了真的是很羡慕

之后便有想交女友的想法，

但并非那么简单。

说要就有的。。。

但对感情的事情就越来越不敢尝试了。。。很怕会有不好的事情发生。。。

无奈～YF说的对。。。

我们应该在我们还在学院的这段时间里再增添点回忆的。。。

今天就是不敢开口拿号码。。。。

哇～原来那么难。。。

还说什么邀请人家出去的大话。。。

不过，明天还有机会！应该好好加油的！

GOD pls help me a bit on this, i cant handle this on my own!

唉～

今天原本是个很开心的一个约会

都被自己给搞砸

什么跟什么啊！

自己没事情做屁股痒去问什么废问题！

害得桃子都不理我了==

我是真的喜欢桃子

但我真的给他那么不确定的感觉吗？

我很想跟他在一起的

可是很明显我还不能给他安全感

之所以会这样都是因为

心急

自己害自己。。。

桃子。。。别离开我吖。。。

别离我太远。。。

man learn things not onli from their school books, but of course from their daily life. me myself,learn a lot of things from the malacca trip, and also during the time in JB. honestly, from the time of preparation until the time we begin our trip, i saw a lot og things. much of the ppl dunt like to give opinion eventhough they r having some questions n requirement or problem. silence doesnt mean accept. when we question again, no ppl respond. but the real Q still existed. when the Q cannot b solve, misunderstanding occured. root of this wil be arise by 2 main reason=persistance with self opinion or always keep silence. ppl who always stick with their own opinion if dont explain their motive well 2 others, will let others thinks that the idea shall not b followed. y must we should go to a certain place 2gather? we know that somebody cannot go becos they hav a good reason, but they can go to other place on their own rite? y so stubborn? to some1 who said that, obviously they dont really understand the real objective from the project. so i think we need a good leader on doing a project. some1 who can voice out wat they didnt understand n where is the problem they think abt. ppl who keep silence dont mean that they r cool, they accepted, or they r fine with all of it. in fact they r full with anger in their mind. onli donkey doesnt know wat they r trying 2 hide. keep avoiding the question in the front n talk all the things at the back is not so good isnt it? problem occured when misunderstanding arise.

她的MSN铃声响起，我就跑去看了一下

MSG换了。。。她有男朋友了

老实说，有点小小错愕感。。。算不上伤心

人渣怎么会有心？心还是想

恭喜您，贺喜您，终于找到了另一份真爱

摆脱我这个人渣的约束

真的是太好了，他终于找到了另一个对象

希望他会好好对她

至少我知道他不会像我那样人渣，弄她哭泣

给他多点快乐吧。。。填满所有的一切，把空虚和寂寞都删除

真心祝福你。。。永远快乐

made by: wythe n chris

虽然弄得不是很漂亮

但都是献给你哦

桃子

已经有人向桃子告白了。他很烦恼这件事，跑来问我。我顿时不知道怎么帮他。我也知道那个人的目的。但。。。我能做什么？我不是他的谁，只是朋友。。。能插手吗？累～

有点小怕他会走掉。。。怎么办？

greatful date

today me,dy,xiao lian, and cherie we all went to the KLCC bookfare. during the time, i know a lot of things abt every1. from tat i know actually she is a nice girl, and the relation between xiao lian n dy also seens hav a lot of improvement. they wil play and having joke with each other. quite nice also. abt me n cherie... stil in progress but after the discussion with wythe, the conclusion is she is a nice girl, bad habit ....nope, everything stil alrite. wythe suggested me 2 take action on her. but i refuse 2 do that. eventhought wythe wil not speak smthg fake, but i think i stil need some time 2 know more abt her. expect 4 good future~kambatek o!

桃子

今天在梦里又梦见了他，他出现在我们KL家的游泳池边。不知何时开始，我们一家人原本在玩水，他就突然出现在我们之中。他一句话都没说，就一路跟我们回家。虽然那是梦，但我感觉超沉重的。因为她的出现，导致我早上的心情有点低落。我也不知道为什么会这样，就跟平常不同。昨晚，毛问我，为什么没有在她生日时跟他说生日快乐？我很冷静，但本身也不懂这个问题的答案。我真的不想再跟她扯上任何关系了。我真的很怕。一旦碰上他，我又要跌回原点。又想跟回她在一起。我真的很怕。他留给我的虽然不只是开心的回忆，但也掺杂了很多伤感。当我尝试想回想我们之前的快乐时光时，我真的想不太出。是否我真的很不珍惜那段感情？我的记忆虽然不好，但我能记的东西我依然会记得。虽然人不能拿来做比较，但每次听到荟讲安的东西时，我都会问自己，为什么我没那么做过？为什么我没那么多东西能想念？回头看，才知道自己做的东西真的太少太少了。对他的事情刻意不加理会，为了让自己远离那份罪恶感。我了解我自己。懦夫。。。。

最近身边多出了个新朋友，桃子。对我来说，一开始我对他是抱着想追求他的心态去接近他的。不过他真的还小，他只给我这样的感觉。太年轻了～我们彼此讨论过很多问题，对另一半的要求，最不能接受的事，对于感情的看法。。。我曾经一度冲动的想问他要不要当我的女朋友，但我没那么做。不想再伤害另一个人了，自己一个好一点。关系还是朋友。就当作小妹妹看待吧。他很爱玩，怕被管。这些不经让我想到她。。。阴影。。。一切就看本身的造化吧。是对自己已经很绝望了，因为之前的事。真的不敢了。。。真想对自己大喊：“大胆面对将来吧！！！！，我过去统统忘掉！！！拜托～！！！！”

belinda

recently i discovered a lot of my bad habit. dunno y, even myself also cannot tolerence all the bad habit. y? try 2 recall, even myself also cannot tahan, how i gonna let my frens tahan? sometime i try 2 work it out, but really cannot lo...i told this 2 wythe yesterday, he was agree with me 2... but y dont u tell me earlier? it wil b help 4 me...i know myself more n more during the time spent... little gas, dont like 2 share things with ppl, even good fren. omg~ but they r diff, they wanna share, they like 2 share. how can i b like them? jus try 2 work it out...

by the way, YUNNI is not my cup of tea.. and i realise that if u r get close 2 some1 with a motive, then wil feel terrible man! so i desided 2 stop the plan. i think now, wat i m gonna do is fulfill all the things i must do, i like 2 do, and i hope 2 do 1st. that will be the 1st i would considered. n BELINDA,i think b4... but will i b the one 4 her? i m not sure yet... jus wait n c gua...

YUNNI

is this real?

saturday i went 2 coll 4 swc activites day. i thought we r gonna prepare those games 4 oursider 2 enjoy. but the real truth is, we r the participants. is it very nice yo...2 enjoy the games that prepare by all the department. n also thank you YOU ENN the program master of the event. it is really cool. becos we hav 4 department involve in this event, so each department must design a games. p.m. they design smthg like game station, hav 4 part. we hav word guess, caterpiller move, blind walk, and brain juice. caterpillar walk is the toughest game i ever play b4! my hands is hurt! move without using ur leg and members must stick 2gather using their legs.=.= whose idea is this! i gonna kill him! but is very fun indeed. haha~ thanks again.. during the games, i met a girl name YUNNI, all i can say is nice, frenly,sporty, and whole set of nike. n she is a virgo 2...hav a little bit interst on her. but stil under investigation. wil update when the result is out.

终于做完PC FAIR了。。。认识了好多人，知道了好多事，也认识了更多自己。。。没想到自己原来是那么自私的，什么都不想跟别人分享，却又想分享别人的。真的很累。这次做的公司是LENOVO，薪水平平，人品烂烂，态度更差。不知道他们是怎么样做生意的，连我这个员工都受不了。唉～今天因为太累所以就逃了两堂课，起来看看FACEBOOK，就看到MAN MAN的PROFILE 有了新照片，就进去看看下。不看还好，看了还真是心酸=.=看到她跟她男朋友那么开心，我还不禁有点羡慕。他那么好，也难怪她男朋友那么疼她。带她到出去玩，到出去旅行。她男友对他还真是好到～又有钱。。。他终于找到了好归宿。真心祝福她。永远开心。在PC FAIR 里，也认识了 YING KEE 和YUKI，两个小妹妹。都不是很敢接近。。。。（慧琪阴影）。。。就只是认识。不想别的事情在发生咯。。。平静。。。。。。

今天又有人问起了我跟他的事情。。。我还是有种感觉，她在我心里。。。不知道为什么我那么想，但我真的感觉得到。不知道是不是愧疚感作祟，还是我真的还挂念着他。他过得好吗？看见他的PESONAL MSG好像有了些好转。但是我自己的心还。。。很不安定。超奇怪的感觉～唉。。。明明想好要过自己要的生活的，怎么变得自己的人生好像没了什么目标。空虚，放荡，毫无目标的四处游走。我想找个目标，真的很想。。。不然生活真的很无趣。。。目标不一定要是女人，是生活目标也好。。。但就是好像找不到。。。平时跟朋友嘻嘻哈哈，但自己却超怕孤单一人。今天在CANTEEN就是最好的证明。当朋友都离我而去，只剩我一个时，表情会觉得不爽，但自己很清楚。。。是害怕空虚。。。因为自己的另一半已经被自己给亲手推掉了。。。还能怪谁呀？唉～被功课压得死死的，生活变得除了功课还是功课。。。

真的很LAME吖！！！好寂寞。。。

我最后还是选择了对他做出了交代。忽然被人点醒“如果有一天，你的另一半就这样突然不回你信息，不接你电话，对你不闻不问，你会怎样？感觉无辜？痛苦？”回想下，我做的实在太过分了。而我自己却完全没有发觉。开始的出发点只是为了不想再让自己陷下去。明知道自己给不了，为何还要紧抓着不放？放弃挣扎吧，让他去寻求更好的。我知道这样做不妥当，但我还能做些什么？又来借口多多。。。为了掩饰自己的愧疚感。。。现在的他逐渐好转起来了，希望他能忘记我这个不负责任的王八蛋。。。别再记得我，我只是你生命中的一个污点罢了。。。我辜负了你，也辜负了自己。现在自己真的怕了，不敢再陷入这种感情东西。好恐怖，好痛苦。看着别人一对一对，脸上都带着笑容，多开心。。。算了。。。真的算了。。。还是别去害人好点，多积点得吧。。。haiz....

sometimes, a person really need a break. especially when he/she face the most difficult decision in his/her life... haiz~dunno how 2 explain also. my heart feel stress n hard..even begin emo d! omg~ now i m still doubt about my decision, is it really right or wrong? how 2 determine whather it is right or wrong? i been called as a coward in my own blog.who is the person call me that is now important, but is the issue... i know i m coward,but sometimes i really cant do it jor...'keep protecting urself by saying u r trying ur best d!' wat a good excuse!' after seeing this comment, i been thinking myself....it is really true? m i taking this as an excuses all the time? m i? honestly...i really treat her very bad. i know... but i still blaming her for wat she did. wat human m i? even wanna break up also dont hav the dare 2 say...thats y i m a coward. she still appear in my mind. dont know y...everything i seen, will make me remember of her. the brand of face wash that she always used, her birthday date, the favourite food that she likes.... all of them pop up one by one day by day... silENCE will take over my emotion. very sorry 4 not letting those bro who r caring abt me to know abt this blog...although i m having a new life, at the same time i m also having a tough life... i feel terrible man...seeing a lot of couple walking on the road, my heart feel unconfertable... celine is jus a fren of mine. i admit... at the beginning i said i wanna woo her. but now, the feeling r changed. c the photo ,keep remind me that 'can i let my girl be as happy, and smile as she did? i think i cannot. too difficult to me... i keeping encourage my frens to think positively, but i m the only 1 who always thinking at the bad side.i dunno... sis told me b4, when ppl having compliment 2 u, u wont remember. but when ppl talking the shortcoming abt u, u will take it to ur heart. i dunno... i think i really need a good rest. sorry 4 doing all those things to hurt u... i m really sorry... wish the next person will give u happiness...